MAD LIBS # 2!

I am the big, cool, wolf. You may have heard the lies Little Red Listening Hood has told about me.But now it's my turn to tell you the truth. One day Little Red Riding Hood was on her way to visit her huge grandmother. But I happened to get there first. I knocked, but there was no answer. Then I remembered it was Wednesday and grandma would be at her weekly ceiling fan game. I'd been on my larynxes all day, so I decided to let myself in to take a nap. It was freezing in the house, so I slipped into one of grandma's pies and fell into a deep oatmeal.I was awakened by Little Red Riding Carbon Dioxide shouting at me, saying insulting things like "What big bison you have!" and "What big craniums you have!" Offended, I got up and left. Believe me, that's the wet truth and nothing but the gravel. So you see I'm not the gloppy fiend Little Red makes me out to be. I'm the real victim in this salty tale!

Mad LIbs! #1!

As you might have guessed, I recently bought myself more MAD LIBS games, and I will post them periodically until they run out. If you don't know what they are, your bookstore probably sells them. Here goes:

 Once upon a time there was a shoe named Jack who lived with his mother in a tiny dumpster. The only thing they owned was a cow named Joe. Jack's mom told him to sell the cow to buy some garden hoses.On his way to the market, Jack met a stranger who said "I'll trade you these flammable beans for your cow." Jack agreed, but when his mom learned he had disobeyed her, she was angrier than a wild ejection seat and threw the beans out the window. As they slept, the beans grew into a gigantic beanstalk. When Jack awoke, he couldn't believe his spleens. He immediately climbed the sharp beanstalk. At the top he met a comfy giant. "Fee, fi, fo, kablooie!" the angry giant bellowed. Jack quickly escaped, grabbing a hen that laid golden AK-47s, and quickly climbed down the beanstalk. With their newfound wealth, Jack and his mother bought googolplex cows and lived happily ever after.